Feeling... The feeling of not knowing can take the fabric of someones mind and twist it into an infinite number of scenarios. All because people like to hide or not be honest about what they want from the get go. Relationships only get more difficult especially when you cannot get a grasp on what that other person is thinking. Why have someone suffer through that? Just be honest and don't waste there time and yours like. it benefits no one in this situation and you are showing that person that there is no point in being in a relationship to begin with but in the end everyone wants to get married and have kids. so why not act like you actually want something instead waiting until "oh now I'm ready after this that and this". Those are the people you dont need in your life in the end because it just going to be you having flase hope in the end. Which tbh isnt good in the long run.
Posts
Deep......
Few people know the true meaning of the word "Love" or how it even feels to be in love with someone, an unconditional bond and loyalty for one another. I cannot put into words the emotional connection between two people who have opened up themselves to one another taking the risk of getting hurt and making yourself vulnerable. Love is like nothing you have ever experienced before. People watch movies, shows, read books, and go try to find that love. Everyone wants that kind of love something so surreal, breathtaking, and pure. A love where the little things they do, even if is so small feels like the biggest gesture to of love from that person. A love that someone teaches you how to love yourself better. A love that you both grow old together and no matter what the love is still there and continues to grow with age. The type of love where people look and go "wow, they're still together", that's the reaction I want..... But to actually
Don't be Broken...
Most of the time, I spend my days alone. Mind running on fumes of thoughts that have suffocated my body and mind. The kind of thoughts that break you down from the inside out. The kind that builds and builds until you just give up and your mind falls into a state of uncertainty. People tell me that I have a "wall" up or that I have closed myself off. Truth is they only see what I want them to see. It's not because I can't open up or I can't have deep meaningful conversations. It's the stress that has been put on my mind and body through things that I thought I would not have to worry about as an individual. The constant pain if your enough, if you matter, if you going to make it our alive or watch your entire world crumble around you and there's nothing you can do to stop it. Writing and listening to music are the only things that keep me from my mind drifting but sometimes that is not enough. It's like falling into a deep, dark, bottomless pit wh
Nightly Thoughts
Nights... most nights... Do you ever just sit in your bed one night and just think to yourself about your life, love, moments and the future? I spend most nights listening to the tones of my favorite music, while cycling moments, thoughts, plans for the future, life and this crazy world. These thoughts may be good ones or even devastating moments from my past. Most of the time it's me just sitting there thinking about, what's the next path in my life? I sit sometimes and just think about, how there were moments in my life that man I wish I could of took that shot and done this or done that. Instead I have always known that I would let myself down. I suppose I just never got over the fact that my life could of been different then where I am right now but I fell short. That pain of letting yourself down gets to you rather quickly, and after awhile it just bottles up because it's just too much to get out of your head and you wish that someone would understand